Dear mom

Mom, ada bnyk hal yg ingin aku ceritakan. Akhir2 ini aku terlalu sibuk dgn kerjaanku,dan sedikit melupakanmu. Sungguh menyebalkan bekerja dgn orang2 yg tdk inspiratif dan hanya menebarkan energi negatif. I know i should not whining, i have to cherish my life. I did. But its too overwhelming to me. Yes, i have to deal with it. I'm trying. I just need you to be around.

Mom, this year i'm going to be 27 years old. I'm grown up now. I'm not a boy anymore. And its time for me to tell you something. But promise me, what i'm going to say wont change the way you love me.

Mom, people born with their own uniqueness. We agree with that, dont we? So do i. I'm different. God, its hard for me to say it. Ok mom, I am gay. I like man. Fuih... Finally i said it. I'm so sorry have to tell you this way. I wish i could talk to you face to face, told you everything about me. I would give the world to have that chance. I dont have a courage to do so.

I dont know what make me gay. I dont know the reason nor need it. I just felt it,even when i was a child. That explained a lot of thing huh? Thats why i never like practicing soccer, or playing robot2an or mobil2an.
Please dont be sad. Its not your fault. Its nothing to do with you. Just myself and i.
I'm still the same me, your beloved son. Its just my sex orientation different with other normal man. That's all.

Day by day i'm trying to accept my gayness. Being me. The real me. I'm tired faking every each day. Pretend its just temporary. Hope one day i will back to the right track. Meeting lovely girl,getting married and have a lot of kid. But i cant. I even not tried. I dont want to lie to myself.

Am i happy being gay? I'm not sure. I haven't meet my soulmate yet. Love of my life. Thats why i come to you. I need your advice. I need a lesson about love. Well, i need to find the answer by my self, dont i? Cause eventhough how hard i'm trying to ask, you can only see me from above.

With love and respect

Best regards,

Your beloved son.